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My Story.

Grief is present in so many of our life experiences: Illness, death, significant life transitions. I’ve had a lot of these experiences over the past thirty years, and grief was at the center of all of them.

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In those earlier years, I felt like life was happening to me and that the rug was constantly being pulled out from under my feet. There was seemingly no rhyme or reason for anything. No solid ground to stand on. Life was nothing like I thought it would be – life felt wrong, even.

 

It seemed like everyone and everything that I loved, I lost (which is true for all of us).

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I tried my darndest to control life. And I secretly and silently hoped for someone or something outside of myself to step in and save the day and lived like that for years. I was constantly disappointed with life and out of alignment with my true nature.

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This way of battling and resisting my life's circumstances left me feeling alone, isolated, and as though I would always be fighting one thing or another. It was time for me to put down the sword and battle gear and settle into a new way of relating to loss and grief. I was tired of numbing my emotions simply to survive and overcontrolling life in hopes that I would prevent any more losses.

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So, I set out on a path of self-transformation and dove into a beautiful world of mind, body, and spirit self-care approaches to wellbeing.

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I joined yoga classes, meditation sessions, Ayurveda and nutrition courses, nature's rhythm workshops, pottery classes, and healing rituals and ceremonies within a loving community ... I couldn't get enough! I even became a massage therapist!

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Nourishing myself with food, energy and plant medicine - and amazing friendships and family ties - I realized that there was a whole other way of living.

 

To live in harmony with the flow of life, whatever it brings, was foreign to my fighting spirit. I began to tend to my pain and carefully mended my broken heart. Realigning to my new circumstances (and with life itself) was so refreshing and life-giving and filled me with hope for a new and healthy life. I noticed changes in my body, mind, and spirit as I shed old patterns and habits. I began to tap into my creative spirit, which had not been acknowledged since childhood.

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I noticed a theme in all the classes, workshops, and retreats I was immersing myself into: almost everyone was seeking solace amid grief of one kind or another. A divorce, a job loss, a significant death - even the grief of growing up in a world that doesn't quite live up to what we think it's going to be. And then it dawned on me. I was doing the same thing!

 

I was shuffling from one healing modality to the next, picking up skills and techniques to help me cope with the pain of loss. And it did help, but it wasn't specifically grief-centered.

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Our culture does not do a great job of honoring the time and attention it takes to move through the pain of loss - so often, those who are grieving are feeling very much like I used to: alone in our pain, isolated from the "good vibes only" culture we live in, and very disconnected with one of the most important life events - loss.

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So, I set out to create the very whole-human grief practices and resources that I wished I would have had available to me when I really needed them. I hope they are of some use to you or someone that you love who is moving through a difficult chapter in their life.

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Befriending Grief offers peer-to-peer support, a membership circle, and a variety of immersive experiences that honor the grieving process as a natural response to loss and that provide opportunities for grievers to care for themselves and participate in a loving, compassionate community.

Interested in working with me? I'd love to hear from you.

Get in touch so we can start working together.

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